The only downside so far to having a guy roommate is that when he's doing a walmart run, I just can't bring myself to ask him to pick up a pregnancy test for me. I feel like that's just too much too soon.
I'm not sure how appropriate a drug deal is while at a wake.
We ended up getting arrested after we flagged down the cops for a ride home with open beers in our hands... turns out the "nobody told me" excuse doesn't cut it anymore
We got kicked out of the ice rink last night for drinking and checking strangers... but they let us keep the beer
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
do you know how hard it is to bring up the "what do I do if you conk out while we're fucking" conversation while maintaining the dignity of.the narcaleptic girl you just met?
I walking on her passed out on her bed, clutching a burrito and the walking dead dvd on replay.
I was changing in front of my window and my neighbor text me saying, "nice pubes."
He bought a sex swing! He's building the playground of my dreams!!!!
Did I really drink that whole bottle of Jack Daniels last night?
Heroically.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
3-9 out of 10... Depends on the situation. Taco Bell is more of an idea than a restaurant.
How stoned are you?
I haven't even sucked a boob is 6 weeks I hate not college
You were making out w/ur brothers coach against a door when someone opened it and you both fell through... Then you continued to make out on the ground
I can't tell if my heart is fluttering because I love him... or if it's palpitating from all the coke.
woke up to two girls crawling on top of me forcefeeding me bacon. Best. Hangover. Ever.
I'm at work behind the bar and just washed my mouth out with rumple bc I don't have a toothbrush. This may be a new low.
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