So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
Eric said he heard us having sex the other night. He said i did a great job.
u ever jackoff with ur legs spread and pretend ur fuckin urself as a girl and get mad u'll never know what that feels like. Or to fly like a bird?
Did u absorb a fraternal twin in the womb?
if you ever come into my room screaming for me to set up rockband at 4:45 am ever again i will kill you
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10 dollar pizza all the toppings you want. Wait Until You See This Pizza
Bob the builder, bob the uilder bob the builder bbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbjbbbbbiotch!pp!!!!
Just went through the drive thru and got 18 free donuts in exchange for half a joint. Dunkin Donuts at midnight might become a nightly thing for us.
Just had to pull out another loan to pay for that public drunkenness citation. I am so ready to graduate.
He called me while he was having sex and asked if I wanted to go get mcdonalds
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For future reference, the blowjob coupons I gave you for your birthday are NOT transferable to pay your friends for tacos.
Dude, they're still mid-coitus. Pretty sure running in to high five my roommate mid-thrust is a mood-breaker.
Can we just talk about how I wrote out all the stuff I had to do this week and for Thursday it says "drink and cry"? ...I don't remember putting that but it sounds like something I would do
I literally just skipped to the fridge when I realized we had enough vodka left to get day drunk
My legs feel like baby dolphins
Will Smith has a direct hotline to my emotions
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