my math professor just wrote "parallel" on the board, but spelled it "pararrel". guess what country he's from
new hobby: convincing random sorority girls around campus that we hooked up last weekend. i'm 2 for 5.
She just sucked the buffalo sauce out of my beard. I've never been so disgusted and hard in my life.
I'm gonna go out on a limb and say it had something to do with pool sex.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
is there a way to sugar-coat "shes in jail" when someone is texting me asking where their friend is?
Kriste-san. Brian-sensai going to sleepy times acturry. Kriste-grasshopper will spend fun-fun times with Brian-sensai and glorious redbox movie tomorrow yes?
Most creative movie date proposition... ever.
But how do I turn off the feelings though?
Vodka.
She invited me to Bikini Yoga with her friends. Sounds promising.
You're right. I woke up today with my ugly sweater still on and no pants. I'd say it was a successful night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Last time I was your wingman I had to deal with a girl whose only interest in my body was to clip my toenails. I'm not interested.
Being a fine ass woman in a world full of fuckboys is the realest struggle I've ever known.
The stall at this bar had mirrors all around. I just looked at myself take a shit from like 3 different angles
the D I S R E S P E C T of sending someone nudes, them opening it, and not bothering to respond
He pulled out the guitar, sat in tub, and took requests while she puked her brains out in the toilet. I think he loves her.
Im drinking a CAN of bud light at the bar. Do you really think I care anymore?
Randomize