Please explain to me what this has to do with my fantasy to fuck larry king?
anyone who buys me chipotle gets an automatic hj
you started puking right when a nickelback song came on..it was epic
I wish you got a notification every time someone masturbated to a Facebook picture of you...
Moms kinda upset I threw up in grandmas bedroom. I think ill stay in tonight.
i found the one person in the world who takes longer to cum than i do... mutual dissatisfaction is probably not the best foundation for a relationship.
Giving me the bigger bowl of ramen isn't considered "romantic"
It's like, I'm the official vagina for that DJ group
Wackin it to the USA womens soccer team. My own personal way of saying job well done.
I just came so hard there were tears. Actual tears.
They sat me on college avenue with a puke bucket and people were mistakenly throwing change in it. Got me enough money take a cab back to my apartment.
No more jager for that guy. He jacked the neighbor kids big wheel, rode around making jet noises, then passed out behind the wheel and rolled it and broke his wrist
Our first kiss happened while shot gunning a hit from a gravity bong. Its that type of relationship.
No feeling is better than coming home from your booty call and putting on a fresh pair of granny panties
I know I'm not a hook-up kind of chick but he is a firefighter & an EMS worker. I felt like maybe I'd be a good person if I let a good person inside of me
Randomize
