i had just passed the point of no return when my mom opened my door. I hid my dick and took the porn off the computer in time but i still had to explain my day at school to her WHILE i was jizzing in my pants.
No - a douche bag is not a fashion accessory. They do not make Gucci Douchebags
its like she was born with a silver dick in her mouth
I DONT WANT TO PLUS I THINK I FLUSHED MY KEYS DOWN THE TOILET WHILE I WAS PEEING
I can do it, this is my punishment and I will accept it, plus id like to see the look on peoples faces when I throw up on them
Well apparently I'm no fun since I won't have a threesome with him and my mother.
This has been the most pleasant arrest experience I've ever had.
Not sure if you carved a butthole or vagina in that pumpkin but that didn't stop high Phil from mounting. My study group is horrified.
Didn't know hookah bars could end badly. I feel for her hair
I made a side by side comparison of her Facebook pic and the chick on the anti meth billboards. Plus a ven diagram showing mostly shared physical attributes. I sent u the PowerPoint. You were sufficiently warned.
I put my hydrocodone prescription in my cereal box its like real lucky charms
You know, you have a good excuse now if you have a poor performance. Just say "what do you expect? I took a paintball to the DICK!!"
Visiting Houston was a good decision for my penis.
Ok you had this coming you put a sponsored filter on a dick pic
Do you know why I slept in the yard last night?
You said you watched the lion king stoned and had to do it for simba.
Pride rock will get you every time.
Randomize
