physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
I dunno... she just cried a lot and I kept sighing.
she doesn't hate you. She just thinks you need a personality adjustment, speech therapy and weight watchers.
Then she called me a home wrecking whore.
dont they live in a condo? that doesnt count.
My alcohol tolerance is way too high for this paycheck.
I fingered her though her window because she couldn't leave
I feel a five day drunk coming on.
she had a dildo shaped like a dolphin. she will forever be known as Flipper
I'm gonna look back at these days one day and be like "damn I shoulda been turnt but I was in bed instead watching netflix"
Sorry for yelling at you, I'm just really emotional about missing comicon.
Do you know how close I got to throwing him over the edge of the canyon?
Let this be a lesson to you, parmesan cheese crumbles are not a good substitute for coffee creamer, no matter how high you are
You know its a good morning when you wake up with blonde hair extensions in your pocket. . .
I'm really excited to meet your new dude! But we really need to find out if he's your cousin first.
Well, if I'm gonna go gay, it's gonna be for NPH
Randomize
