My feet smell like cheese. Makes me hungry.
I'm glad girls dont get visible erections
But, it would have made life so much easier...
he asked me if i had ever jacked off high and then referred to it as a "man-to-man question"
She was so wet my fingers were literally pruney when I got done with her
Well he has a girlfriend. So I told him that I wanted to have sex way more than I wanted to be a decent human being.
He never broke character while fucking me on the neighbor's lawn. I give him a 10 for his dedication to the British accent.
I hope you have a dream of a sloth with my face touching you erotically
The bros used their bong water as pong water but I walked in mid game and didn't know so they hit our first cup and I chugged it.
Only ESPN could find the two ugly girls from a school in Florida
I need someone to sew my vagina shut until I'm responsible enough to use it
Her blow jobs are legen wait for it seriously like 9 people I know brag about them dary
My parents get here at 6 so I have to make it look like a sober virgin lives in my room by 5.
OH MY GOD YOU GUYS I JUST FOUND OUT I HAD PHONE SEX THE OTHER NIGHT
That's because I've spent the past 21 years convincing my parents the only emotions I have are sarcasm and bitterness.
PSA Do not blow dry your junk.
Randomize
