Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
Bridesmaid dress fitting. I look like a Weeble and Michelle looks like Malibu Barbie. I have to keep reminding myself that she has herpes so really, the playing field is more level than it might initially seem.
She just said she finds Tyler Perry funny... this is not going to work.
There r osticjed everywhere
at one point he was caressing me in the kitchen asking me my name over and over again and then asking what my favorite continent was
Depending on hangover severity. The fact that I can spell severity is in your favor.
We need to be on the same page regarding the 3some this time. No more "one of us should probably leave" moments.
Crap I still need to get you a wedding gift. I'm just gonna give you a bag full of cash, lube, and condoms. And I'll use furry handcuffs instead of ribbon to tie the gift bag handles together.
You should photoshop their heads on tigers first!!
For my parents' annivery card? How high are you?
He was still there when I ran half naked into my suitemate's room where she was skyping her boyfriend and I started singing I JUST HAD SEEEEX
He started making out with my boobs. I didn't know whether to be proud of my boobs or ashamed of my mouth.
He's still short.... And probably a douchebag. But if we ever run into him downtown I fully encourage you to take him home and have "I hate you douchebag" sex and lick every inch of that disgustingly toned chest.
Are you in a good mood because I stuffed you with enchiladas, ice cream, penis, and cuddles last night?
What happened?
New Orleans
Every time
Her new crush is a 6'2" guacamole baron that may also be a Jedi.
Randomize
