Hahahaha do you think bella ever gave edward head?
if i get killed by an online date, its your job to tell my parents that we met at church
Bisexual people are plain selfish.
Just so you know, each of my boobs fits perfectly in a martini glass.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
what is TOTES MCGOATS in spanish?
been sitting in chapter for 25 minutes. drinking last night's franzia out of a XXX vitamin water 10 bottle. recruitment chair has no idea. life is good.
on the way home the dog started throwing up her bone in the car..so naturally i started to puke too
not to mention it took an hour of antique roadshow to calm my dick down
You can't have your penis and eat it, too.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have a third degree burn on my inner thigh from the blunt dropping on me in the car
I need a genital shamwow being this wet.
I cannot lay down. I will throw up my life and your life and the class hamster I had in third grade.
Had an orgasm and got a charley horse at the same time. It was a multi-purpose scream.
The amount of dicks I have seen in the last hour is more than I have seen in my whole life.
Let's make this a nightly thing. You'll explain the Watergate scandal like you're telling me a bedtime story while I eat popcorn high as fuck
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