in vegas stuck in the middle of a pride right now
Pride?
thats a pack of cougars
go fuck yourself
Going to have to start putting down newspaper if puking the bed is going to be a habit
Overdraft my account again. Parents are starting to ask questions. What would go over better a gambling or drug addiction??
She told me my dick looked like a baby seal wrapped in a sleeping bag.
I puked in my fridge last night while I was trying to get water
How do you think the people in my class would react if I ripped all my clothes off and jumped on him right now?
Cops just came and got two guys out of my class. I can't do college. Seriously cannot rage at this school anymore.
Just ran into a client at a sex shop. The meeting tomorrow is going to be really awkward as we both try not to picture each other using vibrators or role play costumes.
The bag I'm bringing home for the weekend: a change of clothes, workout shoes, and sex toys, that's it.
I probably should have eaten more before I started shotgunning beers at 9am, but it was so much damn fun.
i agree, on both the sex thing and the unrepentant bastard thing
he answered his phone during sex and left to go help that drama queen with her latest bullshit. I'm drinking all his vodka. it's asshole tax
Sorry I trained your dog in Spanish last night. At least he listens to someone now.
Everyone is a disappointment when you lose your virginity to nine inches
i was making a gravity bong in my room and my dad walked in. he helped me finish. i love being home for the holidays.
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