So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
If it wasnt for my iphone and loopt, I would still be wandering the streets in a drunken stooper. Thanks Steve Jobs.
Last night i was so high that i came home and did a taste test of every vitamin water and wrote theyre grade down on paper.
things that need to be invented #43: vodka that also acts as birth control.
I just added her as a friend on Facebook. I met her 5 minutes ago and there are already more than 50 pics of me uploaded... from other nights.
we did anal to Party In The USA and he busted to Firefies .. felt like we were fucking in a middle school dance
She threw up all over when she was giving me dome. Not even gonna lie, it felt really good.
I think my Halloween costume this year will be made entirely of pillows and I'll be Marshmellow girl or Kirby. That way I'm comfortable, warm, and if I fall over drunk I'm safe.
For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)
I literally have nothing else left to cut besides my drug budget; the dark days are among us
If I showed up at your door with pizza and a bottle of tequila wearing nothing but chaps and a fireman helmet, would you send me away?
Also you know what's irritating? When the guy you're sleeping with refuses to like any of your Instagram posts
last night i fell off a barstool and busted my nose. i can regretfully say that i didn't see cherub last night.
Good morning 7am walk of shame. It's been awhile.
She yelled Carpe Diem when she orgasmed. Is it too early to marry her?
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