the night i cant remember will be the night i always remember thanks to my "i
I think my emotional moodswings have reached a new low. I cried for the entire duration of changing my tampon.
12 pack with dinner. Living by yourself is awesome.
I have a new fascination with cutting really small segments of hair off peoples heads when they're not looking.
he had his head down and said he was listening for the buffalo, he had to still be drunk.
I just invented spray cheese vodka. tastes real nasty but does the trick.
I have green food coloring in my hair and just got a text from "Guy in the Yard"...so this morning is going just as you might imagine.
He's the second guy this morning whose job is jeopardized because of my vagina.
I'm not gonna lie. The thing I miss the most about him right now is the air conditioned hotel rooms.
Trying to do the walk of shame over here WHY are there a hundred ppl on the el?! Thank god I pulled a summit and wore casual clothes I even stopped by the farmers market and bought some squash
I don't even remember what he looks like. All I know is he's 6 foot 100. I like that.
Weird, Jen didn't know mixers were solely for coloring purposes. Don't call me an alcoholic because you're uneducated
Well I finally got to say all the things I wanted to say. Including telling him he looks like a naked mole rat
Not my lover. I would rather lose all my teeth, and I fucking love my teeth.
I got the shit slapped outta me last night but the pain in my jaw doesn’t even compare to the hangover I have.
Randomize
