im not picky. i just want someone whod go down on me while im writing my psych midterm paper. thats not a lot to ask.
yeah, that's what i said too. right before i tackled that street sign.
He's like a perfect storm of amazing hair and horrible judgment.
Its important to me that you know there is a tambourine down my pants.
I wore water proof eyeliner just incase the first picture of me of 2012 is a mugshot
I just need to repress my desire to share my impressive chugging abilities with the world and I won't black out so much
He ate me out on the kitchen floor while we waited for the cake to bake. How was your Valentines Day?
He actually just looked up and said I'm gonna cum in my pants. and he did. no shame.
Of the past 48 hours, 46 of them have been spent naked. I'd say it's been a good two days.
You wrote me a check. For zero dollars. For my soul. Dick.
Still pimpin that dick in the cornfields. Now it's just transferred to the local bar.
There's nothing more rewarding than telling you that I fucked your dad
So I'm hiding in my bathroom smoking bowls because my landlords kids came over to visit my dog... My life has reached a new low
He doesn't have much of a personality but he makes up for it with his sexual prowess
keeper.
I just got a rock from a customer. Weirdest. Tip. Ever.
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