She said she didn't think she should have to shave either. Guess no shave November just became no sex November.
I'm taking last night back. It officially didn't happen. Tell your friends.
I'm actually agreeing with glenn beck. What the FUCK was in that margarita?!
it's like heaven, but drunker
Found a 10-can wizard staff hidden in our closet. Did we cut someone off?
That's yours. We cut you off.
I just threw up trying to put pants on. This is obviously a sign to stay naked.
Which is worse rug burn on your nipples or laying there after wondering how long you have to cuddle before you can sneak away?
I'm in the room..It's full of lost souls and sadness. I can taste the salt of their tears. This final might take a few freshman today..
Walking through campus with a grocery bag full of pot brownies. I'm like the santa claus of 4/20
He corrected my use of grammar... I think we both know that means i have to sleep with him
All I can remember is posting my chicken burger in the post box. Postman is in for a treat.
All that fucking tequilla made my head feel like it's inside of a body builder's asshole. He's doing squats.
I don't question myself. That's what I have you for.
I'm honored.
It was a simpler time. With fewer STDs.
I told him I wanted to get on him and ride him to Montana. It didnt end like i thought it would.
Randomize
