so many types of cookies right now. i'm eating four kinds of cookies that i've made into larger cookie sandwiches. too high. whoa.
today i did the best job ever shaving. like my vagina is PERFECT. plus i straightened my hair for a good hour. if i don't get ass tonight, i'm killing a baby.
Whatever, its basically a crime against humanity to miss an andre power hour so she'll get what's coming to her.
i dont want to stoop that low. but my dick does.
After he told me that it's up to him to carry on his family name, I almost felt bad for not letting him cum inside me.
I don't give a damn about what he wants to do with his life. Personalities are for pussies.
Ive only just recently decided that NOT fucking you would be best for both of us.
you were so blacked last night that you jumped in the lake fully clothed, then just went back to the bar and walked around like you weren't soaking wet.
Also, I pretty much need an IV of fluids straight to my soul
Like I want to yell at him for pissing on my floor but there's still a chance its my pee....
HE HAS CHALLENGED MY BADNESS. I MUST CONQUER ALL THAT QUESTIONS MY POWER. BRING FORTH THE TIT PICS.
On the way home she told me she was in kindergarten when 9/11 happened
A guy who takes a plate of chicken tenders away from us is not to be trusted or slept with
He took a shot of vodka and AND ATE ME OUT AS A CHASER. YESSS. I AM IN LOVE.
Next thing I know her tits are out on my desk. It was straight out of a porno. What was I supposed to do I’m not made of stone
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