thought so. i woke up and he was playing with my eyeliner. I MAKE GREAT CHOICES.
is it trashy that while he was throwing up in the bathroom, i was hooking up with his childhood best friend?
Stop trying to talk to my friends!!
then get some ugly ones...
Just ordered a clown who does balloon animals. No backing out now.
I miss waking up knowing you're passed out under my bed.
THERE IS THE SEXIEST BEARDED MAN HERE. I CAME EVERYWHERE.
Btw, just wanna point out that you've hooked up with two guys whose birthdays are today. Congratulations, you have a type!
I need to find out this kids work schedule. I need mustache rides on my lunchbreaks.
He was spooning with the dog when I came home. Now shes afriad to go near him. Should I ask?
my math prof is telling us what to do in a gun fight. i dont want to live in oakland anymore.
My life is a clusterfuck of men and disorderly priorities right meow.
So ive come to the realization that my affinity for tattooed guys makes me the literal definition of tit for tat
It's not even 7 yet. She's singing you are my sunshine to the smirnoff bottle.
See and now you're talking. I am like the fairy godmother of hook ups.
If the multiverse is real, would you screw yourself? I'd screw myself.
Randomize
