i can't help myself.. i am just so in love with the kitchen manager.
...he was wearing JNCO shorts.. i'm pretty sure i saw the dragon.
if I could go back to kindergarten and not fuck up my life, I so would.
And then she proceeded to fling her bra around while screaming the rocket power theme song, still managing to not fall off the skateboard
it's too soon in the relationship to think about him when i masturbate. so i think about his dad instead.
Last night in my drunkenness I bought hurricane supplies which included a jug of wine and a bouquet of flowers. Apparently I'm going to woo Irene.
that freshman chick we always see on the weekends walked into art class wearing a jaegermeister shirt and holding a monster, which she proceeded to shotgun with a pair of scissors. It sickens me to know I will never achieve her level
There was definitely a significant amount of cookie dough in my bra
I had to explain the gravity bong to my mom. Right after she pointed out I have a lot of dicks on my floor at any given moment.
I think animal control just caught me smoking a bowl on the back porch. Do they have any say in this matter?? Haha
This number has temporarily been disconnected and will be restored to service once you get rid of you girlfriend.
Milk that cash cow for all the shots she's worth
he had a Pillsbury dough boy tattoo to remind him of his drug dealing days
My dream date: Hotdogs/nachos from the bar & tequila. Is that too much to ask?
I swear every time I see him he's either dancing or trying to touch people
At one point she put on my dads pants and yelled after him EMILIOOOO! Dude, my dads name is Mark.
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