its like accelerated beer pong for children.....we train champions young
No, I'm in the bathroom trying to scrub off the 16 tally marks on my wrist so its not so obviously to the world that I puked on a couch last night.
Maybe not, but you have to admit watching him get hit by the car was gratifying
Ok but if you die you have to get "I should've listened to Mike" carved into your tombstone
"Let's chug a beer then make out" doesn't sound as nice, but it would prob make him cum right there.
Should i put up a tasteful banner for your party that says last chance to sleep with maya?
I look like one classy bitch running in heels through my backyard while carrying a small dog and a large bottle of booze. How am I still single?
Seems like you've kicked summer 2012 off well.
It wasn't so much skinny dipping. It more like skinny walking...through a fountain.
Got drunk with him at an Irish pub ended up losing him for twenty minutes when I finally find him his piss drunk singing Irish folk music with a group of Irish guys and a midget
He meets the coolest people when he's drunk
Well I just found a coupon for cheese in the bathroom so I've got that going for me
So you don't take a regular pic with her, but you take a selfie with her ass. Interesting...
I am passing the whore torch on to you my friend. Do me proud
Long fucking story. But hey I got an orgasm and breakfast so I'm winning.
My new dentist just kinda stared at me when I told him that I used to have partial dentures after breaking 2 teeth while beating the shit out of someone, until I puked them into the toilet and flushed them after getting high and making myself undercooked mac and cheese.
Your dad was just slow dancing with the priest and holding a beer. Classic
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