She def said "you had your chance!" after telling me she had a boyfriend. Like a pile of dogshit lecturing me on how I missed out on having itself stuck to the bottom of my shoe.
One of my students just said I have "big mommy parts". Even third graders know that my tits are too big. God I love em.
I thought he was kidding when he said pretend to be a dunkin donut delivery women. This is the last time I ever role play.
yea, their son has been arrested on more than one occassion, their daughter is pregnant and their other daughter graduated but she was adopted, so clearly genes are everything.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have already decided that it happened in an alternate universe since both of the people involved don't remember it and we only have the word of a sober person that it happened at all
We are sitting here staring into each others eyes, mutually rubbing forks up and down our respective noses. High as balls doesn't even begin to cover it.
Lets both be adults and never talk about last night again.
Just bought shock top, Trojans, double shots and baby oil. At 8 am. While the lady in front of me bitched about her expired coupons.
I mean it's a good blow job, but it's not worth the four hour round trip.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
this whole "benign brain tumor" is truly a blessing in disguise. I almost want to start bringing MRIs to the bar because sympathy pussy is flowing like the nile
Do you sleep with the same women I've already slept with on purpose?
I can't hookup with a guy in my car because it smells like Taco Bell..
Hey! you should come over!
Who is this? The number is saved as "Sexy Awesome"
I woke up at 6:30 in the morning on the A train on 14th street. You wouldn't know anything about that right?
So I might join you on the drunk train on the way to poor decisions.
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