He told me they were just razor bumps!
I went out in the middle of the night to smoke my weed.. Didn't realize my dad was sitting on the patio doing the exact same thing..
I want the one making out with the dumpster. Is that bad?
there is a video of me from last night trying to light my breath on fire. that drunk.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i love you man. i hope we fuck some serious shit up this summer.
The spray paint was a bad idea, 'insert penis here' isn't coming off
Names, who you're caught in bed with, both minor details
I sent him a cookie cake that said "Congratulations you're not a father"
she's fucked both of my roommates but not me. i feel like I'm not part of the group anymore
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
she hacked my macbook and downloaded an illegal version of the original pokemon red, completely nude in my computer chair. there were several levels of hornyness existing all at once
I just got dropped off by that cop that pulled you over. Best sex ever! Consider that $140 ticket my birthday present.
How many more times can I say I need to get laid before you kill me?
Just once I'd like to go out and not have to tell you to put your pants back on.
Did you wake up next to Karina?
So that's her name
it was weird going down on him. His picture of Jesus was staring at me the entire time...
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