I hope you get used to having plenty of sperm because you're never gonna get any.
turns out gay frats are just like normal frats, only with more v-necks
So this snow storm is NOT helpin my masturbation problem
last night i found out that about 5 of my friends audio recorded us having sex through the bedroom door, then auto tuned it in the tpain app on his iphone.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They all laughed at me when I bought that necklace from Life Alert. Who's laughing now?
I was just handed jelly beans by a guy in a penguin costume. Standby for confirmation on if they are actually drugs.
I hope they realize that to me "collecting their mail" is synonymous with "fucking in every room in their house, and twice in the party shower."
I said you have to fuck the german guy and take one for the team...it's a once in a lifetime opportunity you know.
He's basically wearing those Nike boner sweatpants. It's hard not to jump him. How has your day been?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We told her to calm down. She said "I'm Buddha!". Then army crawled to the cooler for more vodka.
Its a cash in stratch tickets to afford cigarettes and coffee kind of friday
The problem with drugs is that there's none in this hotel
The problem with drugs is that showing my boobs only gets so much of them
I even put my vibrators back in the bedroom instead of the coffee table. If that's not growing up then I don't know what is.
please tell dad to clear the porn off his tablet before he lends it to anyone from now on
It’s official. I’ve hooked up with all three brothers now
You should go after Dad now
I should! He’s definitely middle age fuckable
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