Pregnant stripper...not hot.
you told everyone your name was brenda and you had the whole party chanting b-dawgg by the end of the night. successful.
Single schmingle. No one actually obeys the relationship boundaries these days. Its 2009.
you'll never guess what i found when i got home...
a cake, in the toilet
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Omg just remembered. I tried to kidnap a dog.
Had to go to the urgent for a physical and I gave them my fake. Nurse was a sport though
I realized last night, I never talk dirty in German during sex. How much wasted potential is that?
He walked in at 7am saying that the police had his shoes and phone because he's being investigated for attempted auto theft.
When you're high, you dance like an injured velociraptor.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why do I have a wristband from the birthing center at the University of Maryland hospital....
Also food confession I ate an entire bag of starburst jelly beans today. and a plan B. All around think I hit all my nutrients
Sarah was butt-chugging wine and diarrhea'd all over the wall
I just walked across town, stoned off my ass and barefoot in 35 degree weather for him to bust five mins in and then apologize 13 times as I got dressed.
I think I may have just hit a new slutty low! ..... Just purchased the Costco pack of condoms... $9.99/48 pack = amazing deal! The judgement when I bust out the value pack = priceless!!!
My history professo slid into my DMs. Granted I did give him “fuck me” eyes during a lecture a few times.
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