seriously this is one of those moments where im glad i dont really talk to or know the people i sleep with
Well said.
and then she said I drew a line on her forehead with my cum and whispered "Simba"
I think my plan to not drink this week was just ruined by my mothers discovery of the chat function on facebook
We decided to smoke and then made crosses on our foreheads for ash wednesday
mom would be proud
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Spending my graduation money on an abortion. Welcome to the real world.
I had sex with her like 200 times, and she was only pregnant once, those are pretty good statistics.
this lady just pulled corn on the cob out of her purse
People like that make this world a better place.
In other more interesting news I'm going to arrange a surprise orgy. You in?
Kyle's mobile fuck service..... Kinda has a nice ring to it don't you think??
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
in the middle of getting head my cat meowed. she looked up , meowed back, and then continued giving me head.
All I do lately is eat steak, drink warm beer, watch porn, and avoid booty calls when I'm too lazy to take a shower. I think the apocalypse turned me into a dude.
I just watched some guy take a shot of jack Daniels, chase it with a shot of ciroc & then violently rip his pants off. You have to come here.
Clothes make me feel like a responsible adult and that's just not something I'm ready to handle.
Seriously? People are paying $45 for Surge?!? I've seen better one night stand decisions being made then the choices being made on amazon orders of Surge
What do you mean not that crazy? I had sex last night. with my\nBOSS. in the restaurant where we WORK.... ON A DINNER TABLE.
Randomize