Can I have the boy from 16 and pregnant's next baby???
Just saw the first guy i ever slept with in drag. I can hear my grandfather saying "i knew she was a lesbian" somewhere
his mom found me in the closet hiding and the only thing i could think of was to sit there and wave.
It's what America was founded on: former hookups referring you for a job four years later.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They sat at the bar while we waited for a table. When the hostess came to seat us, they were shitfaced, and swordfighting wth chop sticks.
She called him at 5 AM so that he'd be ready for her birthday breakfast and drinks at 6. This is why people don't need to wait until their 21st to have their first drink.
Well, I've taken the art of car peeing to new heights
Ugh..Yesterday was a complete alcohol fueled shit show. Not making eye contact with anyone today. Don't deserve it. Eye contact is for decent people.
So I walked in on her and she had taped her fingers together and was crying and was whispering something about "how humbling it is being in constant glove mode"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just got offered bathroom sex. I've never been more flattered.
I tried eating pop-rocks while giving him a bj, I honestly think I was more disappointed with the results than he was.
His dick is pure magic - dark, powerful, beautiful magic. It's the Elder Wand of penises
Mmm vodka always tastes better when i know i have work at 8am
quit whining, rub some dirt on it, and lets get out there
its my penis
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