maybe if you didn't yell 'buh duh duh da duh da dats all folks' when you came she wouldn't have left last night
no, i'm proud of you. this is the happiest you've been since you discovered that bowls can be used as cups if you don't feel like washing dishes.
"reccomended dose" hasn't been in my vocabulary for quite some time.
that's what penises do
they tell lies.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
U shoulda just taken her to a stall and banged her and let me watch the game. Some friend u r.
She just sent me videos of her blowing my little bro and my best friend... worst. ex. ever.
I just typed in random letters on his address bar... 5 out of the 6....a porn site was in the drop down list hahahahaha get a life bro.
he said something along the lines of "fish can smell fear"
I drink way too much to have a type. Last weekend I picked up a guy who calls me "baby girl"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I found a fingernail in my vagina. A fingernail.
My masturbation fantasy just had a wedding theme. I need new hobbies.
I consider my hand a solid 5. So if I'm dipping below a 7.5, I might as well go with old faithful.
We both work at 8am and I have to shower but my roommate is passed out on our bathroom floor with the door locked. Merry Christmas.
Someone fucked a stripper in their rental car, there is goddamn glitter everywhere.
Okay, let's just all take a step back and think about how funny this will seem in like a year... Maybe 2 if his nose is actually broken.
Randomize