lol whn u cming hre I nd 2 c ur fce
IF YOU TEXT ME ONE MORE SHORTENED VERSION OF A WORD, THE ONLY THING YOU'LL SEE IS MY FIST IN YOUR FACE.
I should have known there'd be issues when he included "beautiful soul" in our playlist
I think any school that has COCKS written on it's baseball hats has their priorities straight.
I just saved him in my contacts as "Has 2 kids.. don't drunk text"
You left your underwear here. I'm hanging it on my door
i think i traded my wallet for a tim hortons gift card.
Weve literally been going out drinking five days a week. That counts as a full time job right?
The bartender was shocked when I took the mop bucket from him and told him I'd take care of my friends puke.
And I also succeeded in getting kicked out of a bar when I was drinking straight from the vodka bottle at our table.
He has a burner phone just to send dick pics. It's revolutionary
This isn't good. I can't find my mom. This is why we don't give her Fireball.
Ok next time we are filming it. You bring the camera and I'll buy more socks
Never let the horse trainer ride you, always ride the horse trainer. I have huge bruises on my thighs from his hip bones. That's how hard he rode me
My mom purposely got me drunk so I can stay at her house bc "we don't spend enough time together." I blacked out anyway, so we didn't spend time together regardless.
His dog hid my thong. Let me tell you, the last thing you want during a commando mini skirt walk of shame is lots of wind. There’s a church congregation that knows all my business
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