all I remember was being half naked drinking water on my hands and knees from her dogs water bowl.
he farted when he came. not the best ending to my day.
Just found out that wake n bake is not one of the 7 habits of highly effective people..
Even if he doesn't call, at least I can say i fucked a mascot.
Adams eating in the shower, he says it's one of his favorite places to eat. Btw it's milanos he's eating, he says he loves italy too.
i think i can safely say that is the weirdest thing you've ever propositioned me with. so obviously my answer is yes.
The cop was more concerned with the syringes on the dash board than looking for the source of the smoke. Thank god for diabetes!
See, thats where im at with my life, welcome to the slut yaht we will be cruising comfortably all summer at an extremely drunken relaxing pace S.S. Slut Bucket
i have officially banned the recreational use of bayonets.
Frankly, since I met you, I practically exist in a state of constant readiness for sex
Just had to kick my 26 yr old boyfriend out of my bed before getting the kids up for school. Have I mentioned being 41 doesn't suck as much as all the hype.
Besides, I don't need any more men there who have seen my tits. #bearwatch2014
I found a bar with Metallica and a fire eater. I'm home
Yiu ever laugh so hard you stop breathing? Turns out weed -can- kill you.
it was cool until he whispered 'sounds like you need a good dicking' with a completely serious face and i just lost it
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