so we started it doggy style, but since we were really drunk kinda fell to the side and turned into a 'lazy dog'... my new favorite position btw
i told them to call me paula dean as i was making all 10 for $10 boxes of pizza rolls in the microwave
It's only 11:30 and she's already making friends with the homeless...
Like. There is beer on the other side of that door and 6 yards in. If he's not back in 20 minutes to let me in, I am using this tree as a battering ram.
Aaaand I cut your bangs with a large knife last night ...
I spent the whole party making out with some guy. He wasn't that cute but six of my sorority sisters are fighting over him so I had to do something..
And if I hated you I'd probably say things like, "I never want to speak to you again," or, "Eat a bag of dicks." That's how you'd know.
He wanted me to blow him while he did curls and looked at himself in the mirror. Not sure if gay or ego maniac.
I'm trying to get fucked by 4 girls here, and you're worried about verb tenses?!
I'll pretend I don't know she's blind, my morals claimed the back seat in this adventure.
I just saw a guy in a hazmat suit riding a tractor.
And by not handle it I mean it makes me want to sit on his face
Its okay. I just know how you can text with your hands cuffed behind you back, so I had no idea what "oh shit" meant.
I skipped the handshake and went right for a dickshake I had him minutes after I saw him.
whered you go
woke up in a ditch, shat infront of a little league game, slept in her stairway...i need to come here more often
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