I just pynch a tree in the face
i hate this light. i wouldnt even hook up with me in this light
i want you to feel like i'm letting you into my heart, not just my vagina.
TAKE DOWN THAT PHOTO OF ME IN THE NURSES COSTUME NOW.
he came and i only had my diet coke to rinse.. can you say coke float?
"Hung over, tired and having a faint scent of some body butter and random pieces of glitter from a girl named gigi, almost arrested in drug bust, $40 Canadian in my pocket and all i got was this lousy Tshirt" shirts dont exist, but they need to
hahaha lucky. I'm fishing with some dude I just met when I woke up next to the mohawk river
If her puking on your pool table is her sign of a good night, it's time to intervene.
Her craziness is the sexiest thing about her.
I can't wait to read your obituary.
About to throw up, bathroom line up, Bro sees me. Yells, 'PUKER GET OUT OF WAY' THEY ALL PARTED WAY THREW ME INTO A STALL AND CHEERED AS I THREW UP INTO THE TOILET. we are going back
He sent a video of him jacking off....class will be awkward tomorrow
I will have to bone him sometime between now and July so he will move all my shit again
I'm scared because his knowledge of star trek is turning me on
you started putting peanut butter on your pubes.
He passed out with his shoes on 20 minutes till midnight, and I didn't have a sharpie so I took the cheese whiz and filled his exposed ass crack.
Randomize
