38 yer olds are good kisserssss
love makes seman taste better
Just took my first sake bomb. I love japan
Nothing makes my dick softer than hot girls in rain boots.
Well, a cop just pulled up. This could go either way.
so im sitting outside the gym eating a 20 piece nugget stoned out of my mind, convincing myself this is more productive because im so close to the treadmills.
im getting coffee to go get coffee.
Im throwing up in my trash can so I can go throw up in the toilet. We're basically on the same level.
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
You were dancing with a coffee pot of rum in one hand and a joint in the other. So that should explain everything.
He actually just looked up and said I'm gonna cum in my pants. and he did. no shame.
I just smoked weed out of a baked potato.
You rock my world.
I think you just described to us the most perfect drunken fairy tale that has somehow never been written
I pretty much just wake up, masturbate at least twice, and go to the beach. #Unemployed. I do look for jobs in between all that tho.
I feel kind of like we’re in a gang and tonight is one of those “people are gonna know not to fuck with us” type of nights. And then tomorrow I am going to learn to pole dance. I’m not really sure how I got to this point in my life… but I like it.
we finally found him at 2 am. he was 3 miles from the house and tried running into the lake when he saw us pull up. i don't think he'll be taking ecstacy again any time soon.
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