i hate sounding clingy, but i just wanted to verify i wasn't an asshole in your mind
Made out with me girlfriend while she was peeing. all time high, or all time low?
she passed on me to fuck the foreign guy. is there a manlier, slightly less gay way of saying "always the bridesmaid, never the bride"?
nope.
Disgusting. If I saw her naked my dick would pack up his balls and leave.
It really ruins the moment when you have to ask to resend the nude pics.
I think I just got a contact from my own exhale. Def dying.
I have been sober for so long that I miss hangovers... what is happening to this summer?
don't worry i won't let him get attached. I put on my Hulk onesie after sex and yelled I SMASHED YOU. never seen a guy looked so confused.
Halfway through she said I was exactly like she imagined. So many things have been stroked this night.
I emailed the police apartment to apologize to the officer from last night. I practically threw a hissy fit because he wouldn't hug me.
It was "against protocol"
I have an important idea to tell you when I'm sober about a cat scratching my nose once and what it taught me. DONT LET ME FORGET.
They pay me enough to pretend to be either helpful, or heterosexual. If they want both I need one hell of a raise.
I love the smell of your bedroom. It smells of a mixture of cherries, leather, and unrequited homosexual desire.
I'm being hhit on by creepy guys please come one bought me a penis hat balloon animal save meeeee
Apparently his version of saying "I'm Sorry" is streaking around our apartment building then asking for a blow job.....
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