If someone cant be won over with guacomole and tequila they are not worth your time.
The album was titled "Best Night Ever" until she found out she was preggers and switched it to "God Punishes Sluts"
I have started doing my homework in bars. It just feels right.
You made a list of reasons why you should be on fear factor. You came up with 2 reasons: "I like fear" and "I am fear"
Im going to need an iv of taco bell after this.
He's throwing up in my bed and I'm not even getting fucked for this
On the bright side I still get a $20 referral bonus at the plasma center even though he passed out during donation because he was so high.
Osama's death just kick started our Cinco de mayo celebration. Margaritas for anyone wearing red white and blue!
The beers last night were like the tears from god
it wasn't a normal cookie, i figured that out 45 minutes into my exam
See what happens chris. I told u not to invite her over. Now shes on her way to jail and were stuck with two pomeranians.
After we were done the second time she turned to me and called me a Hardcore Armadillo. Also, her O face involves crossed eyes. You tell me.
Just fat and dog and sweat all over the bed. All night long.
YOUR TO-DO SEX LIST CANNOT CONSIST ENTIRELY OF MY THREE BEST FRIENDS
and their significant others
AND THEIR SIGNIFICANT OTHERS
Since when do my one night stands start sending you friend requests?
Randomize
