Hahaha, sighhhh...I texted him to no response. It's a shame, really...I would gladly exchange my body for pizza rills.
You drinking a lot?
No.
Define a lot
My t9 writes chubies instead of bitches.
either way. win, win.
No shame. Just smoked a bowl with a Norwegian. Feels like something to cross off a list.
Just heard one of my friends say, "if you're trying to take advantage of me I really dont care. I just want this beer." ..
I ate a pepperoni off of someone's floor last night. We need to talk.
As added birth control I warned him that if he knocked me up tonight I would name the baby Truck.
You do resemble something that has been used as a chew toy.
gladiator or hannah montana?
This is why I never have to ask who you are when I get a new phone.
TGIFridays...stall number 1...drunk...send help
So both cops helped talk her into coming back into the bar and doing a shot with me. The main argument being, "a bar is no place to be sober!"
His brother just asked him in all seriousness if it would be cool if they became eskimo brother brothers.
I just want to return to LA when the weed and dick is plentiful.
That's the second time the same cop pulled me over well a different girl was giving me road head
I'm still here... I feel so bad wearing your mom's cardigan at a strip club 🙈
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