they shut off the water. shaving my legs with soda. that desperate.
She just stuck her hand down the strippers pants. Shit just got real.
ITS A JAGER BOTTLE. NOTHING CAN BE BAD IF ITS JAGER RELATED.
if the future wants me to fuck him, then i guss i have to
Last time he went to Europe, every time he started drinking he would wake up in a different country with no memory. There is no way he can be tour leader.
Drunkenly, I gave him a molly instead of an aleve so A) I'm still looking for him and B) I'm not sure about his headache.
So he noticed that I cut a half inch off of my hair. Guess who just earned himself some road head on the way to the twin cities?
Found another bruise from Saturday #stopliquor2014
You're acting like you didn't chug fireball, like duh you have bruises you drunk betch
I would totes reciprocate the nip pic, but I'm sick with a piece of tissue shoved up one of my nostrils and I'm just not feeling that ambitious. Sorry.
Take off your clothes and see if he wants to have sex, that's a good way to find out
We met up and made out in front of an empanada spot, if that's not romance then idk what is.
Just please don't close your legs while I'm down there again. I don't want my death to be labeled as "Head crushed while giving an individual cunnilingus".
So far in 2016 I told someone id give them a blowjob for lasagna.
Alan said you can come over and eat me out anytime you want, as long as we give him enough notice to hide in the closet before we arrive
Thanks for supporting me through Robs retirement. I'm still in shock, but your dick helped.
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