We turned everything surrounding BP and the oil leak into a "that's what she said" drinking game. We've been drunk for a month
Can an epipen be used as a tranquilizer ?
Dude I walked 1.4 miles through the hotel wearing a cowboy hat, pink topped boots, gucci shades, and a scarf and met my parents in the hallway at 7 am how is this not a good start to Vegas?
Do you know what your brother wants for his birthday?
Yeah he said he wants a decent blowjob for a change.
.......
I'm just looking out for you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She is the absolute last thing I would want to screw. Honestly. Fellating a porcupine. Higher on the list.
Thank you, I really appreciate that. I know I couldn't participate in class tonight and I hope that doesn't affect my grade too much. So please let me know of any extra credit opportunities such as fellatio
I feel like I should have backed off when "I love you" came out on the third date. Now I'm in her bed wondering which door my shrine is behind. Fuck.
This guy has a theme song for the joints he rolls
he fell asleep naked and all I'm doing is staring at his weird balls
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We were cuddling in his bed and I asked him a question and followed by making a microphone with my hand and told him to speak into it. If he never talks to me again that's probably why.
You both snapchatted me that. Like, I just got a double dose of penis pastry.
I love when my neighbors have passionate, loud sex to remind me that I'm not getting laid
he was the first penis i touched… i have to go to his shitty bands first gig, i mean come on now
We blew shit up to. With a cannon.
He stopped the gas pump at 69 and gave me my receipt. He wants it.
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