she took out her dip, threw up, and put it back in. it was like a scene from Nick and Nora's trip to the trailer park.
dressing as green man for st patrick's day = free drinks all night long
I like how you try to look sexy and just end up looking like a weird boy.
Funny how often beer equates to second degree burns on some portion of my body.
... was I dreaming when we did coke off of the xbox, or did that really happen?
There was no way out of it, seeing as I left my photo ID right next to the vomit.
I just want a pillowcase full of fast food so I can eat and sleep this hangover away
Hypothetical question. Say I was bleeding profusely, close to your house, and needed a place to go to clean up and perform minor surgery on myself. Like now.
He offered to let her do a line of coke off his hard-on. She said she'd had that hard-on and it would be a bump, not a line. Everyone laughed. That's why he left.
So that answers the first question but not the second: how the fuck am I getting home?
I'm not the one who gave a guy that lives next door to my grandmother a blowjob in a pub bathroom in Ireland, you have no room to judge.
I've been here 20 minutes and a sweaty naked man has kissed me on the cheek.
He literally just peed in a trash can in our room. It didn't even have a bag in it
Weddings might be fun but they are not getting fucked in the wilderness fun.
hey can you send me that pic of that dude?...if this isn't Rochelle's phone...can you please find and tell Rochelle to send me that picture of that dude?
If a weird guy texts you in the near future asking if you are satan just go with it
Randomize
