Hi, this is ****, we hooked up a few weeks ago. I was wondering, do you have any STDs?
I could write a book called "things that come out of my vagina"
you spent the night getting lap dances from a stripper with a c-section scar then ended up at a one room casino by the airport and you say you're too good to blaze and see pirahna 3d? bullshit
You were rubbing your foot on one of your legs and kept saying, "My sock feels like a waterslide!"
he/she has shaved legs and makeup on. but a spare tire stomach, high socks with high heels...a wig and glasses. and still talked like a man. it was a nightmare scenario
I might be a bit. I accidently started hot boxing the bathroom. I'm just gonna go with it.
You lured him into the bathroom with a trail of jello shots, then proceeded to barricade the door with duct tape. You really should have thought that one through..
I'm not taking advise from someone who responded to the pickup line "I have a penis"
And if I could both stabilize myself *and* pick things up with my penis... Well, I wouldn't be on the fire dept...
I am not getting you a goat.
Fair enough. I am not going out with you. The goat was not negotiable.
its like my brain is a tree and you are those little cookie elves
I had sex with a mask on because I have the flu and I didn't want to get him sick.
Would you think less of me if I were eating pizza on the toilet right now?
Got arrested last night. My cell mate just added me on Facebook.
Someone threw up pink in the shower, there's a golf cart tipped over on the lawn and Cousin Brian is missing. What could Friday night throw at us?
Randomize
