Sooo... I woke up in the shower this morning. It was on.
just a forewarning-if you come home and hang out with your stupid girlfriend the entire time that you are here/fail to get wasted with us i will wish either death upon you or that you truly do turn gay when you return to the navy.
so this was truly a case of the blacked out leading the blacked out.
Fell into a man hole last night. I've been bleeding since 11pm. Got kicked out of the bar for being bloody.
I think that's the key to being an adult though... Get those rapid fire beer shits out I the way early, then you can go about your grown man business
Don't linger or you will get sucked into spending the night. Remember the mission mantra: GET OFF
He just walked in the house and decided to wake everyone up by yelling "I SHIT MYSELF!" We all thought he was joking....we were all wrong.
I left the bar I'm on a bench across from the bowling alley taking a nap please come get me. I've had three lollipops.
Drinking a grey goose and water in a random chair that I found by the road by myself
So there's that.
I did not have sex with him because he had a puppy…finding out he had a husky pup waiting back at home was just an unexpected plus
You wanna see what happens when frozen corn meets an unhappy Andrew's face?
The more time I spend surrounded by Mormons, the more I miss alcohol.
Wait an hour then go and untie him. Bring toilet paper and some spare underwear. Want anything from Starbucks?
What happened last night dude?
YOU SHIT ON MY FUCKING COFFE TABLE THATS WHAT FUCKING HAPPENED!!!
It's taking all of my will power not to chug this margarita. This must be the life of an adult...
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