at some point when you're making out with the ex girlfriend of your ex fuck buddy who happens to be the ex boyfriend of the girl that you just got drunk with who was hitting on your current fuck buddy who is best friends with your ex boyfriend, it just hits you: oh my god i need to get out more and expand my social circle.
it was worse than that time i tried giving evan head 4 days post nose job.
Bt dubs, I still have cuts on my arm from when you attacked me with a dildo on Saturday night.
So not only just find my adoption papers that I didnt know about in my parents house, but they say "child shows some signs of mental retardation".
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dude. FULL moustache. it was like getting head from Tom Selleck
I love watching others lives come down to our level.
already putting money aside for 4/20. you ready for the greatest tuesday ever?
so she sprained her ankle somehow and her friend had to carry her out while all 7 of us watched. do we even need to vote on that or is that automatic induction into the hall of shame?
We decided to cut you off after you insisted on eating peanuts by the dumpster
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So it sounded like a midget was barfing IN our walls again this morning ...
I'm sitting at work trying to dust glitter off my pants. I can't hang out with her anymore.
I have got to stop taking so many uppers and downers simultaneously. My life is a Dali painting.
I was trying to pee in the bushes and the person who lived in the house where the bushes were planted started knocking on the window to get me to stop peeing in their bushes
it was an ACCIDENT
it was a DICK
QUIT BEING A BITCH, DRINK SOME PEPTO, AND PUKE ON OUR FOES
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