I didn't exactley write on my bucket list -- "hook up with a townie at a drivers intervention program"
chugging beers on the train. people are staring. I would be offended if it wasn't 8:30
Good news. Isn't krabs. Bad news. Not sure what it is. Worse news. Encouraged not to fuck till known. Great news getting laid tonight
just run out there and shit all over the driveway when he comes.. and then point at him
I'm going to shower the piss off me now. I feel like I was in an R. Kelly dream.
I want you inside of me and on top of me and under me and behind me
Basically I need you to be like god, just fucking everywhere
all i remember is walking in on u shitting and crying listening to shawty get loose. its safe to say this break up has taken a toll on u
Siri makes being stoned even easier. I don't even Have to type my texts myself
Though I typed a half of that one
Is it bad that I'm tracking my period with Instagram pictures?
You're an independent woman who is defined by her own actions and not by whether or not you have a man. You also have great tits.
My tits became the mascot for the SAE house last night.
If the guys trying to booty call text me could see me right now in some raggedy pajamas with toothpaste down the front of my shirt eating pepperoni out of the package they might change their minds
I fucked his roommate. And that roommate's best friend. And my roommate. And my roommate's old roommate.
i'm bowing down, but slow your roll.
Last time I had a one night stand he ended up stalking me for two months.
So you're not picking up this weekend?
This weekend, I am Angela, visiting from Calgary. We'll have to roleplay this.
She just texted me saying "come over and eat me out, my vagina smells like honey glazed ham." I know I shouldn't be, but i'm just so curious.
Randomize
