Crosby and Malkin: Two girls, one cup.
About tomorrow. if it dosent fit dont force it. Just pushit as far as you can and i'll wiggle the rest of the way
If she's not going to maintain the upkeep of her vag then I'm not going to pay the rent of being her boyfriend
Can I get a "hallelujah" for railing my pastors daughter last night?
Y'know, "Class cancelled because Professor is stuck in Mexico," is not something I expected in college. Let alone, "Professor is stuck in Mexico, AGAIN."
Because of his penis, I can't even look at a hot dog
sex in a tree stand. check.
you lucky bastard
I have a strict rule of what enters my vajay. It's either sparkly, or human. Anything else and I draw the line. Standards.
When I tell my children how I survived hurricane Sandy I'll probably leave out the threesome
Its like bringing all that milkshake to the yard and I'm a diabetic and can't have any
The highlight was when a stranger was nose to nose with you threatening to kick ur ass, and you said "Is that your real face? Stopped him dead.
Apparently calling shotgun while getting put into a police car is frowned upon
I just masturbated while watching Say Yes to the Dress
This is what my life has come to
if i hadn't ended our catfight by hugging you one of us might be dead right now
Dad smells like hangovers and 65 years of bitterness
Randomize
