My mouth tastes like defeat. Did he at least have money?
She has a t-rex face on a stuart little body.
its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
just looked up how to break up with someone nicely on google. glad to know im not the only one who looks up this shit.
The guy I fucked last night is well worth up the ass tuition. I just wish I could tell dad thanks!
There's nothing I can say to make me pepper spraying you any better
Found an old burrito under my bed
You are a sick fuck
This is the second girl that said she wanted to fuck me while wearing a clown nose. Fuck online dating
I vote we get high and sneak off to McDonald's to get mcflurries.
YES. ALL MY YES.
someone just got arrested on campus...
holy fuck look at all that cocaine
So apparently, after 11 beers, 2 pitchers of sangria and 3 rhum & cokes, the idea of popping a load of MD and jumping on the trampoline, in the woods, in my underwear was the best one ever.
He's completely obsessed with his ex but gives phenomenal head. So overall, yeah, good first date.
Why do my weekends always degenerate into using my little brothers childrens board games for drinking games?
Dad smells like hangovers and 65 years of bitterness
He's really cute...He stopped talking to me because i pulled my skirt up and peed in a demi plie position...
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