I dont remember anything after Tequila & Apple Juice. May have disovered the recipe for mental bleach.
Her parents hate her and she's on like major lockdown. All her friends are in jail and she has massive pit stains. Dude... It doesn't get much worse than that.
I accidentally asked my mom for a blowjob because 'mom' and 'molly' are next to each other in my address book.
just told my prof that "i dont give a fuck" about the final. nothing like a having a signed employment contract already
some people wear their heart on their sleeve but you just wear your vagina on your face.
I also tried to drunkenly adopt a kitten last night. It didn't pan out.
All I know is he mentioned whips, leather cuffs, and a riding crop. It's like Halloween, Christmas, and My birthday all in one. a 5 year old couldn't even possibly be this excited.
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
Dude shes not that fat. Plus, last night I probably would've done it too.
The whole time we were fucking I kept thinking, "My dad would love this cologne. I'll have to ask him where he got it." the highlight of the night is that I figured out my dad's birthday gift.
One of my students submitted a thesis proposal to find the exact correlation between desire for sexual intercourse and vaginal heat.
Tell me you accepted it! This is critical fucking research!
I survive off of bourbon and the tears of others only
Where are you and why are you fighting with a bird?
Listening to sad Lana Del Rey songs together is an integral part of the lesbian bonding process
he's smothering me... and not in the good, can you move your thigh off my face please?.. way
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