My professors need to stop cancelling class. Bad things happen when I have too much free time on my hands. Bad things.
I have surprise drugs for everyone
someone just drove by blasting livin on a prayer and threw like 6 bagels out the window... was it you?!
I'm lonelier than Tom Hanks in Cast Away, right meow. Ready to make this bong my Wilson.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he was wearing ninja turtle pajamas and he STILL got laid. who the fuck is this guy?!
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
one of the RAs is here. he told me his name is optimus prime and then took his shirt off and fell down
Just wait til you visit, there will be an endless supply of fresh dick for your demand #economics
Where are you? We're in between the guy dressed as a giant inflatable penis and the Justin Bieber lookalike lesbians
Does the penis have a genital wart?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Definitely thought about throwing up in the cat box since it's not as far to the bathroom..
i don't know man... i just want to listen to John Lennon every time i finish fucking her. is this love?
I mean metaphorically speaking, maybe we've all fucked on top of a frat house at some point in our lives
My relationship: I'm wearing batman panties and a tiara right now trying to get laid and he's doing dishes.
I got poked in the eye with a penis last night. How's your day?
She shouldn’t care what consenting adults do behind closed doors
You do realize it was her husband you were hooking up with behind that door, right?
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