your butthole totally puckers for the ginge
I understand how i shit in my shoes, but explain why you were wearing them.
Me too!
if i wake u up at 5am tmrw by coming into ur room wearing nothing but my indiana jones hat and purple socks while singing 'courtesy of the red white + blue' will u be pleased or annoyed
keep in mind this isn't open to negotiation, i'm just trying to gauge ur reaction
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is it bad that when I see ugly people make out, I hope he's impotent?
just found my calculator watch from 6th grade. the hipster transformation is complete
I created another version of Halloween, it's called swalloween, whatever girl in a slutty costume you bring home has to swallow or forever be known as the holiday grinch
I feel like I knew it was fucked up, but feared that god would take my dick away if I didn't use it last night.
Hey, if I can't get it and you're still alive, can you get the glass out of my foot? Happy Sunday.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I fail to see the problem of enjoying a glass of wine while I poop...
the point I'm tryimg to make is that you didn't need to take the whole box in with you
Next time I think buying tan-thru bikinis is a good idea, remind me of that time I passed out in one and burned the epic shit out of my pussy.
When was that?
Yesterday. Bring aloe. For my pussy.
So what happened? Or does sex + ramen pretty much cover it?
Fell off the toilet trying to reach to put my tampon in the garbage. Pride hurts real bad.
You don't know bruises until you've been banged by 3 drunk bagpipers in the back of thier bus
I saved a sauce packet from taco bell that said "Free me" to use in my next break up.
Randomize