$35 all you can drink last night. Friend 1 woke up in a hotel lounge, friend 2 pissed himself and woke up wearing friend 1's spare pants, and my toilet indicates I threw up extensively.
I'm at derby!
The kentucky derby! But its night time, theres no way the horses are awake at this time.
At what point in time did you decide the pot head with Taco Bell was more important than all your friends.
At about the same time you guys weren't burritos.
at least franzia made me throw up pretty colors.
It's safe to say that our attempt at trying to fuck in the grand Sierra elevator was a bad idea.
The last thing I remember is pushing my way into the bathroom and dumping a 40 on him. We havent talked since.
At what point during this road trip should I let them know I've been drinking in the backseat the whole time and can't take my turn driving?
No, the real question is if you drink like I drink why WOULDN'T you wear a cape.
A sandwich with pizza as the bread. I love you.
YES WITH THE SQUARE KIND OF SLICES
is there any kind of "im boning my neighbor and he happens to be a manager at walmart" discount that our new relationship entitles me to??
Also. I think I just got sentimental over a nude
Everyone says she blew me in the bathroom, so I believe it, I just don't REMEMBER.
First. I had the strength. Now. I am the death.
Apparently swingers are magnetically drawn to me?
We're on our way. We couldn't find our clothes this morning, so we're driving your car half naked. You owe me a cigarette.
Randomize
