Well listen chief - never again do i want the scenario of going to the ER totally naked and partially drunk to b a possibility.
Lets go to the mall and pick up some fat chicks and take them out tonight so we can be the skinny friends
Ya know, years from now when that kid is old enough, I'll get to regale him with the story of how I was his father's AND uncle's first gay experience.
I made weed fried chicken. What have you done today?
Well, I can't relate. I have no idea what it feels like to withhold sex. Or have self-control in general.
I love how my cats smell like pot.
no. the fact that it's halloween completely overrides the fact that it's sunday. youre going out whether im dragging your boring ass or not.
getting a black eye the first day of spring break really sets the tone for the rest of the week.
If you were curious as to how many pounds of bagged marijuana can fit in the trunk of a 2010 Chevrolet Aveo, we now have the answer
We are buying drugs from a guy with a Jesus fish on his dodge caravan.
My signature move is making guys wonder why they bothered in the first place
We both work at 8am and I have to shower but my roommate is passed out on our bathroom floor with the door locked. Merry Christmas.
It's like if you wanna bond just do a ropes course or have group sex you don't have to be weird about it
We couldnt find you anywhere and when you finally answered your phone all you said was "im safe"
What happened last night? I just woke up and there's like 15 mcflurry cups on the floor
You don't remember stealing them?
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