This dress was meant to end up on your floor
I woke up naked in my living room and my mom was next to me like we need to talk
some girl just asked me how to spell unconscious. I really want to know what she was texting.
Only I would come home from a random banging with beer and watermelon
I mean... It's a win/win situation. I mentor the kid for an hour and then I get to fuck his mom. I know deep down I'm helping them both
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
There are six slides. In going to pee in five of them. You have to guess which one to go down. Agree?
Agreed.
I almost tried texting you with my pipe. Holy fuck this is good shit.
You are a lesbian wizard with red hair. You are willow
I just farted so loud someone came to check on me. Thought something fell in my office.
I can not believe he edited a picture of our three way and made it his profile picture
Is it ok that I asked him half way through sex why he hadn't accepted my friend request yet?
he's the kind of guy you give a fake number to and he still finds out your real number anyway...
Damn. Looks like nobody I know is doing anything interesting. Guess it's another slut-it-up-with-strangers sort of night.
Like I'll lick your nuts to make you feel better if you don't get it
Randomize
