just jacked off with my ROTC uniform on. boy i feel like an american.
I couldn't tell if those girls from the bar were lesbians or just awesome
I cant talk about it right now or let you guess, but its something you and i would do. Kinda like that time we had the case of beer and went bowling
You hooked up with minors in a golf cart?
Did you get your crutches off the street sign?
I'm not considering your visit a success until we've fucked every cock in the ethnic rainbow...between the four of us we should have it done by x-mas
I think that's the key to being an adult though... Get those rapid fire beer shits out I the way early, then you can go about your grown man business
I look like one classy bitch running in heels through my backyard while carrying a small dog and a large bottle of booze. How am I still single?
Seems like you've kicked summer 2012 off well.
you should probably know that there's a naked dude in your window
i wouldn't normally say anything but you seem to not be there
this one kid was speed-mumbling about putting broccoli in the printer
I ate the most amazing corn dog today.
I will probably dream about it.
I snorted xanax while wearing reindeer antlers. Prancer gone wild. Have a merry Christmas.
Spending the night with him made me realize that stupid people both irritate and fascinate me, so I'd say it equaled itself out.
I got titty fucked last night and you're breastfeeding your newborn. Clearly we have gone two totally different paths since 2011.
I need to stop acting like a porn star that isn't getting paid
this dude is way too smart. he just explained to me the different scientific components of drugs while we smoked. i said i loved icecream.
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