...So a 6 ft tall drag queen in heels I would kill for just told me I have a dunkable ass. I'm confused...but I'll take any compliment I can.
How many pudding cups do I have to eat for it to count as dinner?
4.
Herpes is a lot like Arnold Schwartzenneger. Because it always comes back. Also, because it is usually in some way in control of California.
Random 1st period thought: do you think she could put "had a threesome" on her resume?
As soon as the judge read that I rear ended the car from getting roadhead he chuckled. You know he's been there before.
I had a nursing patient tell me that her favorite drink was vodka and ensure...called it a colorado bulldog
she made out with a stripper. how was scrabble night with your girlfriend
You handed some guy a spoon you found, he yelled SPOON GAME, and then the two of you spent the next 20 minutes throwing spoons all over the kitchen.
I have an odd instinct I wont find my underwear tonight
1. Are there men involved 2. Is there food involved 3. Do I have to put pants on 4. Do I have to leave this bed
you told that cab driver that when the 3 of us come togehter it means happiness and love
Let's play, "guess how long my Neighbours have been watching me dance naked".
An "unreasonable amount of ejaculate" isn't a reason to be angry at me.
If I could go one week without being called a maneater or a spanish trolip that would be great.
ALL I WANT IN MY MOUTH IS A GLORIOUS COCK SMOTHERED IN CHOCOLATE. DICK AND CHOCOLATE; IS IT TOO MUCH FOR A GIRL TO ASK FOR?!
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