What are you talking about? And how drunk are you?
Both
can we please move this conversation out of my vagina?
I just woke up and shes still asleep next to me with her vibrator inside her and on. Whats normal protocol for this situation?
Not gonna lie i was comfortable between the allsups air conditioners while you were talking to the cop.
We were all definitely blackout with drunk goggles on, even though you and Amanda were the only ones dressed up as it.
I JUST HAD PHONE SEX. WHILE TAKING A BATH. FOR AN HOUR. EATING A PLATE OF BURRITOS. TOP THAT SHIT.
Nope. Too hot. We just sat in my tub with cold water spraying on us drinking coronas. This summer heat is killing my libido slowly
Tranny group. Dance off. Horse hair and dicks swinging. I. Cant. Unsee. This.
They took my balls.
I'm sorry for breaking our door. And being a bitch about it.
He once bought a dildo and put fifty dollars and a happy anniversary note in the battery compartment I gotta lock him down while hes available
I just had to explain my bite marks to my allergy doctor when she gave me my shots...You're the best <3
Did I fall last night?
I wouldn't call it falling as much as you tried to lay on the sidewalk and proceeded to hit it face first.
there's no judgement here...i was recently just fingered in my dorm hallway while having a conversation with 5 people.
are you inviting me to ice cream?
the subtext of everything i say to you is inviting you to ice cream
Randomize
